Everybody loves a neighborhood yard sale. People pull out all of their once-loved items and display them on the front lawn hoping someone will pay a dollar for them. How could items that once were so loved and needed now be discarded and worth practically nothing? It’s kind of sad if you think about it. I guess it’s a bit like relationships sometimes. People you once loved and needed are now discarded and worth barely anything to you.
Is there anything more awkward than walking up someone’s driveway and looking at all of their junk? What happens if you decide it’s all just junk to you also? Do you just turn around and walk away? You almost feel obligated to buy something, so you won’t hurt their feelings. “Oh! Look at these shin guards! Just what I needed! I’m a klutz and I’m always bumping into things and bruising my shins. Are they kids’ size? Perfect! I have really small shins. How much are they?”
I come back from yard sales with so much junk just because I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. And then I go turn around and sell it at the next neighborhood yard sale and hope those people don’t come to my house.
And what is the proper protocol when you are walking up someone’s driveway and they’re sitting there in their camping chair staring at you? Do you smile? Do you make chitchat? Do you talk about the weather? Do you say, “Wow, it all looks lovely!” And then not buy anything? They will know you are lying!
Also, I always think, “Am I walking funny?” I try to walk all tall like I’m a model on a catwalk or something. “Walk normal,” I tell myself. I don’t want them to say, “Why is that girl walking funny?” Then I’ll be known as the girl who walks funny and doesn’t buy anything. Is anyone else self-conscious about the way they walk or is it only me?
It’s also pretty awkward having people walk up and look at your stuff. “What do you mean you don’t want that old used bib? My son spit up on it over 432 times. You know what!? This bib is too good for you! It’s not for sale anymore!”
And then I hug the bib to my chest and start crying and feeling nostalgic. That will really make people avoid my house.
But does it make you feel bad about yourself when they walk away and they don’t buy anything? I’m torn between saying “Don’t worry! I won’t be offended if you don’t buy anything!” and, “How dare you not want this wooden train with a missing wheel?!”
Is what people sell a reflection of them? Can people figure out who I am by looking at all the things I consider junk? Do my discarded items tell a story of my life? And is it one I want everybody to know?
I have never taken part in the neighborhood yard sale because it seems super daunting and overwhelming. How do I know how much to charge? How can I see something I once loved being sold for 50 cents? It seems like it must be worth more than that. Is the point of a yard sale to get rid of stuff or to make money?
Do you have to put a price on every single thing? Do you have to buy those little stickers from the dollar store and write prices on them? Do you group them by items? By price? I don’t want to yard sale wrong! Is there a class for this somewhere I can take?
Luckily, I have a friend who is really good at yard sales, and she gave me some good advice and made me feel like I can conquer this task of taking part in the neighborhood yard sale.
We moved to Wilmington 13 years ago. It was a pretty quick move, and I was doing most of packing myself. Also, I had two young kids with me so I just dumped everything in these big bins and figured I would sort them out when we got to Wilmington.
I’m sure you can imagine how that went. Twelve years later, there were still bins in the garage that had never even been touched. My mom was always on me about sorting through those bins. But You know how life goes. And you know how listening to your mother goes. I’m kidding, I listen to my mom now. It only took 45 years.
Well, life doesn’t always turn out as you think it will and with all the twists and turns, and a couple difficult years, I found myself divorced, back in the house, and owning it on my own… with a garage full of bins that had not been opened in 12 years. It seemed like a metaphor for starting over and cleaning out, so I decided to finally go through them. The timing coincided perfectly with the neighborhood yard sale.
So, I slowly started going through the bins. Cleaning out the bins, cleaning out the garage, and cleaning out my life. I honestly had no idea what was in most of them.
The first bin I opened had a box of Cheerios in it! That expired 12 years ago. I think it might’ve even been opened. What was I thinking? That they don’t have grocery stores in Wilmington? That I was going to unpack this box right away and probably figured it would be good to have some snacks handy for kids. Don’t worry, I did not sell that box of Cheerios at the yard sale. Although people like strange things. Maybe a vintage 12-year-old box of stale Cheerios could’ve sold. It was embarrassing and too much to explain so that just went in the trash.
Another bin was full of vases! Ten beautiful vases! I didn’t know I owned vases. Who needs that many vases? Did I have a vase collection? Was I a vase collection person 12 years ago? There were some colorful ones, but they were definitely not something I needed. They went in the yard sale pile and they sold quickly. I guess people liked my vase collection.
Another bin was full of coffee mugs. But each one of them was wrapped in one of my ex-husband’s favorite t-shirts with a funny saying on it. He loved the funny t-shirts. I guess I didn’t have packing paper, so I wrapped each coffee mug carefully in one of his favorite t-shirts.
I assumed we would get down here and I would unpack them quickly and he could have all those t-shirts back. I wonder if he misses those t-shirts? I wonder if he even remembers them? I wonder if I should give them back? I ended up just selling them. He’s lived without them for 12 years. But also, why did we have so many coffee mugs? Who needs that many coffee mugs?
There were bins and bins of children’s books. They have always been my weakness. I chose my favorites like the Knuffle Bunny books and all the Berenstain Bears books and put the others in a bin to sell. Even though it broke my heart. I guess there are things you love that you don’t really need.
There were bins of DVDs and bins of video games, but the ones that broke my heart were the bins and bins of children’s toys and games.
There was the big Thomas the Tank Engine collection. My older son was obsessed with Thomas, and he would never leave the house without a Thomas train in one hand and a Percy train in the other hand. Not only did I have to keep track of my wild kid when I went out in public, but I also had to keep track of a Thomas train and a Percy train. SO I needed extras.
We would always come home from the bookstore with a new Thomas train and a new Percy train. My husband would look at me questionably and ask, “Don’t we already have a bunch of Thomas trains and Percy trains?”
And I said, “yes, but what if we LOSE one?” Which did happen, so I feel justified here.
There was the Star Wars collection and the Hot Wheels collection and everything I pulled out brought back heartbreaking memories of my kids being little that I could hardly stand it. I saved some things, of course, but I also knew it was time to get rid of all of that.
My garage had been a messI was excited to clean it out and make it my own. I found a new toilet in the box in my garage. I know that you can sell these things, but I mostly just wanted to get rid of everything, clean it all out and start my life over.
I grouped things by prices and just had a big blanket that was two dollars, a big blanket that was five dollars and so on. On the morning of the yard sale, I dragged the blankets and the items on the front lawn and waited.
People started showing up early. And people LOVED my stuff. I wasn’t such a stickler with the prices though so when they asked if they could give me a lower price I of course said sure because I was super excited that they liked my stuff. And also, the thought of an empty garage filled me with so much possibility.
When I say my garage was a disaster, I mean my garage was a disaster. I didn’t get to go through it all before the yard sale because time ran out and it’s pretty much an impossible task.
I pictured my yard sale day with me lounging in a camping chair, making chitchat while people straggled in to look at my once-loved belongings. I even had a couple books that I planned to read during the day. But that’s not how it went.
Things were going so quickly, and I just knew I had more stuff and more bins in my garage so I spent the day just kept going through bins and dragging stuff out and placing them on the blanket and they were pretty much sold right away.
Who knew I could clean out my garage during the yard sale at the same time I was selling my things?
But the day went on, and I kept dragging out more things and dragging out more things and people kept buying them and buying them and by the end of the day, my garage was empty.
Buying is a loose term here because towards the end of the day, I was just giving everything away for free. Toys, books, DVDs, kids’ games, kids’ toys, a random new toilet, furniture, paintings, and so on.
It was all happening so fast I didn’t get a chance to sit and look at each item and decide if I really wanted to give it away or keep it. Everything just went on the blanket.
At the end of the day, I had an empty garage, an empty blanket in my driveway and surprisingly an overwhelming feeling of sadness. I guess we all love our junk more than we think. I guess cleaning out and decluttering can be painful.
As I sat there, looking at my sad, empty garage with his stained floor, I knew that he needed a new beginning, too. Even after that long, grueling day when I was exhausted and covered with sweat, I got in my car and drove myself to Home Depot. I bought the prettiest dark green paint and came home and stayed up all night long painting the floor of my garage a pretty dark green. I found some old light green paint left over from my bedroom wall and painted half of the garage walls. He looked like a brand-new garage. Brand new garage, brand new me, fresh starts for both of us.
But all through the next year when I needed something, I would keep thinking that I have it somewhere in my garage until I remember that I sold it in my yard sale. So, I’d end up buying a new one.
So, when this year’s neighborhood yard sale came around, I sat this one out. I want to keep all the junk I have. I’ve even replaced some of the junk I sold. I didn’t buy a new toilet or a box of Cheerios, but I did buy 10 new Thomas the Tank Engine trains and 10 new Percy ones. You know, just in case we lose one.
Cooking Failures 